Men's ProgrammeCourage. Compassion. Connection.
As a man, it’s likely that society has been giving you certain messages throughout your whole life.
Recognise any of these?
- You can’t be afraid
- You can’t show fear
- You can’t show vulnerability
- You can’t fail
- You can’t doubt yourself
- You can’t be wrong
- You can’t be soft
- You can’t have any weakness
- You can’t be ridiculed or criticised
It’s the message that boys, and later men, receive from all sides in society: ‘Don’t be weak! Don’t be a pussy!’ – that any demonstration of emotion is a sign of weakness. But you still feel the emotions, right?
OK, so here’s a thing.
As a Business Psychologist and an avid observer, for some time now, I’ve had an idea of developing a special programme to emotionally support Men At Work.
Out of curiosity I googled the term ‘support for men in business’ to see what’s available on the topic. What came as a result was quite shocking.
The immediate suggestion from Google was: Did you mean: ‘support for women in business’, and then in the first position was advice for men on how to support equality in the workplace.
Hmm, Interesting, I thought!
Why We Need to Support Men Too
I have asked men their own opinion about the topic, and the results have been so interesting.
Men themselves want to be supported, and want to be shown the way to support others at work. The results of the survey I put out speak for themselves:
85% of men who took part in the survey think there’s a strong need for a dedicated programme for men;
95% think there’s a strong need to coach male leaders on how to support both men and women emotionally;
Over 90% feel stressed at work, either sometimes or always;
And yet, over 50% of men say they do not have a “safe space” or opportunity at work to talk about how they feel.
This is so damaging – and it doesn’t have to be like this. Read more in my blog post on the topic: Why We Need To Support Men Too
If you’d like to have your say in my survey, I would love to hear from you. Please click here to fill it in: Kasia Murphy Men At Work Survey
The lack of self awareness and awareness of others’ emotions is costly not only to individuals’ mental health, but also to business.
Do you sometimes feel like this at work?
- It’s hard for me to come forward and seek help in my organisation, as there isn’t a ‘safe space’ for me to do that
- If I were to name my feelings, sometimes I’d struggle
- Men who show emotion are perceived as weak
- I’d love to be more true to myself at work and show vulnerability, but it might end up with me being embarrassed and others thinking I’m not strong
- I feel ashamed if I don’t keep up the appearance that I feel OK, and everything is fine.
Once male leaders recognise that showing empathy, being kind and allowing yourself to be vulnerable is NOT a weakness, but being your true self, then they encourage others to be truthful and honest as well. The aggressive competition disappears in favour of trusting cooperation. It’s the answer to creating a more supportive and productive culture at work.
What to Expect
Each programme is tailor-made to resolve particular issues at your organisation. However, amongst other company culture-specific dilemmas, there will be sessions with real life scenarios discussed by real leaders and mentors invited to the programme, and we will work through the following:
- The power of vulnerability and authenticity – how can I be my true self
- How do I listen to others? And are difficult conversations really about what they seem to be?
- How can I respond to others‘ displays of emotions at work?
- The power of empathy: empathy vs sympathy and how to help others
- How to look after myself: holistic approach to my mental and physical wellbeing
- How can I show compassion to myself and others?
Get in Touch
Tel: 07538 712187
Milton Keynes, MK8 0NU